Rosie S.
Yelp
We went to see "Rise of the Planet of the Apes" here on Sunday afternoon. Sunday afternoon of the weekend the movie came out... we booked our tickets online to be sure they didn't sell out, and went 45 minutes early to ensure we got seats. My friend had warned me about the lineups on Saturday at the Scotiabank Theatre. I was putting into place safety measures. I was so focused on getting into this movie that I forgot my iPhone at home. This will become more important than it seems later in the story.
We were among about 20-30 people arriving to see movies at all screens. Mr. Rosie S. was hungry and we assumed they would have some options for a lunch-type nosh. NOPE!
Food options are lacking SEVERELY. And the only available substantial "meal" was hot dogs (of course, they also had nachos, popcorn, candy and chocolate, Yogen Fruz and slushies), and they weren't going to be ready for another half an hour (after the movie started)... so Mr. Rosie S. took off to eat, and I was charged with saving us seats ASAP!
When Mr. came back from his meal, he was charged with getting us snacks. Apparently, when the guy in front of us who was ALSO hungry and expecting meal options was like, "What am I supposed to do? Can I go grab food from somewhere else and bring it in?" And guess what? They were actually cool. They let him bring it in. So that is worth one-half star. That star's other half is made up of the pleasing ticket prices. It was about $20 for the two of us. Lovely, and unexpectedly cheap. I have some inkling as to why.
So. I make my way as quickly as possible to the theatre so I can snag us good seats before they're all taken.
I am the first to arrive to the empty, soul-sucking void that is a theatre at The Beach Alliance Cinema.
That was the least enjoyable theatre I've ever been in. Please at least some elevator music? Even a cheesy radio station? Let your ushers and cleaning staff take turns with their ipods?
The only reading material I could find in the building was the Beach Danforth SNAP and Beach Life mini-magazine.
So nothing to read for longer than five minutes, and I was the only person there. There wasn't even stupid trivia or ads on the screen. I don't care how stupid it is... anything is better than a loud, constant feedback drone. OY! You could promote community events through the BIA, put up the CP24 feed, do a slideshow of historic photos of your building's history, or the area, or SOMETHING... advertise your lobby snacks... I don't know. Listen, you could arrange a partnership with the aforementioned publications you stock in the lobby: you get ads in their paper/mag, they get to create and run their own advertising client ads pre-show on your screens. Or maybe they could sell your screen ad space for you - either as a third party or as a partner who offers it as a top-level ad buy and then passes some of the revenue on to you. Just sayin. You could swap ad space with a radio station too. Visuals AND audio. Amazeballs.
Remember how I forgot my phone? I couldn't check my email, play a game, look at the weather... I didn't even have a pen to work on my grocery list.
It was effing CREEPY being alone in a semi-dark, silent (except for the feedback zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz) movie theatre... with nothing to do and no one to look at.
I think keeping us "plugged in" is part of customer service
in this niche of the entertainment industry (i.e. movie theatres). I don't require a suped-up fancy laser-show arena-style theatre, but I either need a) ambiance (vintage and rep theatres apply here) or b) distraction - in the form of ANYTHING I have listed elsewhere in this review: reading material, arcade games, food, in-theatre ads, a musical background...
I chewed through an entire pack of Bubblemint gum before FINALLY a family showed up (HUMANS!!!) and there was something else for me to focus on besides the empty, buzzing, shadowed nothingness... that is, the emptiness and the impending Yelp review... Thank goodness.
We paid $17.50 for two packages of candy ($2.49 in any store - swedish berries and skittles) and two SMALL fountain drinks. FOUNTAIN, NOT BOTTLES. They probably MAKE money selling that stuff. Or it's like 3 cents a month for them. And it's not the movie theatre 20-oz. "SMALL", it was like an actual small. Like a coffee cup. Like a medium Tim Hortons coffee cup. Ouch.
BUT all in all, the movie worked... that's the other star. We watched it start to finish with no issues. Played right through. Sweet.
But that's kind of not the point. Isn't their job to create an atmosphere? And NO, your five arcade games circa 1997 don't count. Especially since they're in a narrow hallway, not a room. They're an eyesore, not a viable option for entertainment.
Am I spoiled? Maybe, but next movie date night, we're going to try the OTHER closest movie theatre to our new 'hood, at Eglinton Town Centre.