"In the wake of its 20th anniversary, Per Se remains all business. The carpets are plush, the service is adequate, and the food, served in an 18-table room teetering over Columbus Circle, is just engaging enough to keep your heart rate steady. It won’t take you on a magic carpet ride, but there aren't many glaring defects. Per Se’s greatest flaw is that, despite the odd tourist vaping in the deserted lounge by the entrance, it thinks it’s still Per Se. It isn’t Per Se’s fault that countless casual restaurants and wine bars now serve the type of food that used to be reserved for white-tablecloth spots. And there isn’t much they can do about the fact that caviar has become as common as table salt. But you’d think that this place, which is still one of the city’s highest-profile fine dining options, would make some moves to stay relevant. Instead, the French Laundry sibling sleepwalks its way through a $390 prix fixe that’s only exciting if you consider it in a vacuum. photo credit: Bryan Kim Without any add-ons, your meal will consist of nine courses, delivered with whispered promises of soubise, sabayon, and velouté. Will you enjoy your crisp filet of sea bass in a pool of sweet carrot butter? Or your teaser-sized portion of rare, chewy lamb served with exactly two malfatti? Probably, in a polite sort of way. But we’ll bet you one chicory salad with butternut squash that you’ll immediately forget almost everything you eat. As if they’re afraid of being outdone, the wines by the glass are similarly luxe and boring (look, a white Burgundy), and the cocktail selection, with its cosmo and brandy crusta, appears to have just finished watching the finale of Lost. In a room that could seamlessly merge with a Marriott conference center, a muzak playlist only reinforces a groundbreaking absence of vibes, and servers perform their duties with an impersonal style that suggests that a $1,000 check is no big deal in this part of town. Masa is next door, so technically they aren’t wrong. photo credit: Bryan Kim Part of the issue is location. If Per Se hadn’t sequestered itself atop a high-end mall, it would feel at least 20% more lovable. Price is another problem. Several hundred dollars is a wild amount of money for a meal that’s easily overshadowed by more accessible spots, many of them run by Per Se vets. But that brings us to the subject of time. This restaurant doesn’t seem to know or care about what’s been going on around it. Twenty years is a century in New York City, and the words “Per Se” don’t mean what they used to. Food Rundown Tasting Menu Per Se serves a nine-course tasting menu for $390, with a vegetarian option that costs the same. The menu changes daily, so we can't say for certain what you'll encounter, but you'll find a few examples below. photo credit: Bryan Kim Salad Of Butternut Squash One of the courses of your nearly $400 meal may consist of a few leaves of lettuce with a smear of butternut squash puree. A cry for help, if we've ever seen one. photo credit: Bryan Kim Oysters And Pearls Per Se's signature dish is, in fact, delicious. Oysters and pasta-like balls of tapioca arrive submerged in a warm, thick sabayon topped with a heap of caviar. It's creamy, salty, and—to put it inelegantly—similar in spirt to a fancy mac and cheese. That is not a bad thing. photo credit: Bryan Kim Mediterranean Lubina You will, mostly likely, get a piece of fish at some point, probably in the middle of your meal. That fish will be well-cooked, with crispy skin and maybe even a few dots of sauce that aren't necessary but do look nice. If that doesn't sound super stimulating, that's because it isn't. photo credit: Bryan Kim Elysian Fields Farm Lamb Yet another item that falls into the category of "food you'd be pleasantly surprised by at a wedding." The fresh and doughy malfatti on the side are fantastic, although there are only two of them." - Bryan Kim
